Mending A Broken Heart

 

Good morning, everyone. How have you all been doing? I have been doing great actually, for the most part. 🙂

I know it’s been a bit since I’ve written on here but mostly because I’ve been doing more writing offline than on. Usually when I write I post whatever I’ve written almost immediately but that’s brought me to a point where everything new is being posted. That makes it hard to come up with new material that you haven’t seen that might go into a book. And it looks like I may be getting to the point where I have an actual book of my very own poetry to offer up to the gods. And to you. I’m excited.

For all of July I have had an accountability partner. I wake up early, get my tea and take the dogs out, and then meet my partner on Twitter. We write for an hour and check in every 30 minutes through Twitter. We’ve been meeting every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. For me this has been a very fruitful experience. In a matter of 13 days I wrote more poems than I did all of 2017. One day in fact, I wrote six poems in that hour. Granted, they were small and probably not very good but that’s six poems I didn’t have before. I am still meeting a partner (though it’s a different one now) and I’m still writing. I don’t have as many poems written for August as I did for July but it’s still more than I would have if I were not writing at all. And that’s always a good thing.

I’m also slowly getting back into running again. I think it’s been almost a month since I began walking around my neighborhood (no treadmill and can’t afford to go to a gym) and I’ve recently begun doing small interval runs. So far I’ve only managed 4 one-minute runs but I couldn’t even do that when I first began again. My wonky thyroid really kicked my game way down and I’m having to start right back at the beginning again. But it’s all good. I will be going in a week or so to have my thyroid levels checked and I hope to hear some good news. I may still have to take medication but the dosage was already lowered so I’m hopeful I may be off it soon, and for good. The exercise has really helped in that as well. Truth be known I’ve actually been off my meds for about a month (mostly because timing is just bad all around and I can’t get a refill until I have my next checkup, which is soon) and I haven’t been experiencing too many side effects. In fact, it’s only been the last week that I started experiencing any at all, and that’s been fairly minor: just a little body temp regulation at night and trouble falling asleep. No anxiety or depressive cycles at all and THAT’S a big deal. The little bit of running I’ve done recently has helped as well. My body is beginning to feel stronger and I’m hoping to get back into shape soon. So, really, I’m getting everything sorted and doing as well as I can hope for now.

Also, today is the first day of school for my kids. I’ve got two back in school and two out. Of the two out of school, one is in Ann Arbor, Michigan and the other is staying up way too late and sleeping in way too late and then complains about not having enough time to do what he wants. So, being a typical teenager with nothing else to do. I think he’s going to miss school soon. As for me, I have a quiet house again and will be able to write in peace. I seriously need a house where I can have my own dedicated office with a door I can close. Le sigh…it’s always something. 😉

Now, a treat for you. Here is one of my new poems for you to enjoy. Shouldn’t need any explanation other than none of my kids have had a broken heart (yet, thankfully) but I was watching my youngest and thinking about the future and what I would and wouldn’t do for him or any of my kids.

Hope you all have a happy Monday and I’ll see you again soon!

<3 Jesi

 

Mending a Broken Heart

By Jesi Scott

 

I held his heart in my hands

In pieces shattered, a broken land,

“Can you fix it?” he’d asked

While I stared at the impossible task.

“I’ll do what I can,” I said,

Placing a kiss on his forehead.

I sat and pondered and tried to start

But how best to mend his broken heart?

With needle and thread to keep it together?

Not glue; too weak for changes in weather…

Metal would give it strength,

But time and rust would wear its length.

So I thought and then thought some more

Until the answer came as if called for.

I began putting the pieces back one by one,

Working throughout the daytime sun

And on through the darkening night,

Continuing on despite

The pain in my back and bleeding fingertips,

Making sure there’d be no rips.

Then one day I was done,

And I smiled at the war I’d won.

For when you breathed life into their chests

You knew, for them, you’d never rest.

So when my son’s heart was broken

I listened to the words spoken

From my own, and heeded what they’d said,

Then gave him my whole one instead.

And with the love I’ve never denied

I sewed up the pieces of his then closed it inside

Myself.

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