It’s Hard To Miss…

Hello, my lovely Lunatics! Tomorrow is the big day! Two 5k runs, 1 day, let the torture begin.

Today, AJ and I went to pick up our Blacklight Run kits. It’s being held over at Texas Motor Speedway, a place I’d been past but never to. So, I pulled out my GPS. Now, my GPS is a total witch with a capital B. She does NOT like recalculating and she is absolutely beastly should you ignore her directions. I’d never had to drive to the racetrack so I chose to use her…until she calculated that it would take us FIVE HOURS to get there. WTF? AJ and I took a look at how she was sending us and promptly turned her off. Thankfully, AJ has been to the racetrack and I got us there, thanks to her instructions, in one piece.Β As it turns out, it’s practically a straight shot from where we live. Not that hard at all.

We got there and got in line and waited. When it was our turn they couldn’t find my information. I had registered so early that I had forgotten that I had (apparently) registered as a VIP instead of a regular registration. (It’s not that big a thing-just means you get a few more goodies in your kit.) So, I had to go stand in a different line than AJ. But it was quick and pain-free for both of us and we were out of there in about 30 minutes. Then back home.

Now, if a guy had given me directions it would have been a nightmare. I’m not beating up on you fellas. It’s a fact that men and women give directions differently. When a man gives me directions I honest-to-god get a headache. Instructions like “drive five miles then turn left on so-and-so street. Then drive another so many miles and turn right. The place is going to be right there and it’s hard to miss.” Do you know how many times I have gotten lost looking for something that’s hard to miss after being told by a guy how to find it? I swear it’s not any wonder they lose things and can’t find them. (Sorry, guys, you know it’s true.) Maybe that’s why I really don’t like my GPS. She gives directions like a man does. They just gave him a female voice.

Women, on the other hand, know how to give other women directions. “Drive to the third light where the Sonic is. Turn left. Then drive till you come to the blue house with the red shutters. Turn right. Look for the house with an insane amount of balloons. You can’t miss it.” These kind of directions usually give men headaches. But other women? We know exactly what they mean and, now, how to get there.

Why can’t my GPS give directions like that?

Jesi Scott is an aspiring writer of novels, a poet, and blogger. She has guest-blogged over at The Well-Tempered Bards, and has a post featured at For Love Of…. Jesi has two poems published in Memories of Mist, a literary anthology, and one published story in a newsletter. She is currently working on releasing her first poetry collection as well as writing her first novel. When not writing, Jesi can be found getting lost in bookstores, singing and dancing around the house, experiencing culture with friends, and generally having fun with her four sons when they aren’t driving her weeping into her closet, which she calls her Padded Cell. She loves to rescue stray bookmarks, as well as books, and has opened her heart to any and all stories needing a home. Archery is her current favorite thing ever but you might want to stand back a little as she still has a tendency to drop the bow occasionally.


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